Sunday, July 25, 2010

folly of the two leggers

The two leggers went to a place they call Costco today. As I understand it, this Costco place is a land where everything is multiplied by 100. In the magical land of Costco, two leggers gather all the things that they require for the next five years and then load them in large non-descript boxes for transportation to my house. This behavior is a bit too squirrel-like for my taste. Another disadvantage is the lack of bags. The bags that the two leggers usually bring me things in are a great source of amusement for both Ivan and I. The only thing the boxes are good for is the occasional ambush smacking of Tiger Lily.
Today the two leggers gathered 3- 50lb. bags of the food that they offer me. As I understand it, this food is supposedly extremely high quality and costs the two leggers dearly. However, seeing so much of it in one place at the same time made me realize that I don't care for it anymore. Therefore I have decided that Ivan and I shall no longer eat this food. I will have to monitor Ivan closely to make sure he does not weaken in my resolve. Ivan's willpower is not as well developed as mine. Tiger Lily will be no problem. I will simply raise my paw in a threatening manner whenever she tries to eat. This will result in her giving a plaintive whine and running to the female two legger to complain. It should be amusing.

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